A man and his children were driving along the road when, suddenly, a loud pop was heard. The car started shaking and dragging, so the man pulled over. When he got out of the car, he noticed a flat tire on the driver's side.
He asked his children to try to change the tire, but they were too young and too small to complete the task. Standing in the rain, the man stared at the tire and considered his options. He was too cold and wet, though, so he got back inside his car and called a roadside assistance service.
He sat in his car with his children, waiting for hours and complaining about being stranded on the side of the road. His children were becoming more and more impatient as well, causing the man to get angry with them too. Finally, a service worker showed up in his tow truck.
The service worker approached the car and asked the man what the problem was. When the man told him that he needed help with a flat tire had been busy all day long, and when he saw why the man called him for help he chuckled. This made the man angry, as he had been waiting on the side of the road for hours. The service worker went back to his truck, gathered a few tools, and went to work on the car.
Ten minutes later, the worker returned to the driver and told him that his work was finished and the man could continue on his way.
“You mean to tell me that I’ve been sitting here for hours waiting for you to come, and it only took you ten minutes to fix my car?” said the man angrily.
“Yes sir. Maybe you should have tried to fix the tire yourself” replied the worker as he began to walk away, shaking his head in amusement.
-----
“Self help is the best help.
Heaven helps those who help themselves.”
(original message)
-----
 |
| Hook and Go Towing |
Author's Note:
This story is based on the fable "Hercules and the Wagoner", part of
which is quoted at the very end of the story. The original fable can be found
in The Aesop for
Children, by anonymous (1919). The original fable focuses on a
wagoner who calls to Hercules for help when his wagon becomes stuck. Hercules
comes to the man, but instead of helping him, he urges the man to try to free
his wagon with his own strength. Hercules told him that the wagon would not
move if the man just stood there and stared at it. The man finally did attempt
to move the wagon, which he successfully did.
For my story, I changed the setting to
give it a more modern take. The overall message remained the same, but instead
of a wagoner calling for Hercules’ aid, a man gets a flat tire and calls for
roadside assistance. The image I chose to include is pretty self-explanatory: it
shows a car with a flat tire.
I chose to rewrite this story because of
the message it conveys. I believe that self-help really is the best help, and I
think that a person should always try to fix their own problems before calling
for the help of somebody else.
Adam,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your story, especially the moral of the story – “self help is the best help.” I have a difficult time with this at times. Sometimes rather than attempting to solve the problem myself, I look for help first. I like to make the assumption that I am incapable of solving the problem when really it would probably be faster if I had just looked at the problem first rather than waiting around for someone to help me. I think a lot of college students have a difficult time with this as well.
Hey Adam,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your story. I have replaced many flat tires on my car and have had to rescue friends on the side of the road. It seems like such a simple thing, but I guess some people have just never learned. I thought this was a cool way to take a moral from an old story and put a modern twist to it. Also, roadside assistance is expensive. So, being self sufficient can save people lots of money.
My dad always says, "Why pay someone to do something that you can do yourself?" That's exactly the message of this story.
Adam,
ReplyDeleteI love the message behind the story: "Self help is the best help." I suggest adding a little more detail and backstory to your characters. Knowing why the man was in such a hurry to get where he was going could make the reader relate to what was irritating him so much. Also, adding a touch more dialogue between characters would add a more personal feel to the story as well. Knowing the inner thoughts of the father as he was waiting on the service worker could really enhance how relatable he can be to the reader.
I thought your paragraph structure was great. Each paragraph contained an important part of the story and led to the next event. I also really enjoy the last line of the story. It shows how irrational the man had been acting. I really enjoy when these short stories end in an ironic statement such as this. Overall I really liked this story and how you took the fable and adapted it to a more modern setting.
Adam,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed this story, because you not only wrote the story with the quote in mind, but you also were able to write it with the main audience in mind. One suggestion I would have is adding more to set the background for the relationships in the story. There is the relationship between the father and his children, the relationship between the two children, and the relationship between the father and the repairman. The story as a whole seemed like it was slightly rushed. While, yes it was a short quote that you were going off of, it could have been lengthen a little bit more for the enjoyment of the reader. I was also surprised by the fact that the father did not try to fix the tire himself, or at least call the number for the repair person again. I know if I was in the situation, I would call one or two more times at least to see where the repair person was.
I really like the modern take you took on this storytelling post. It definitely makes it more relatable to our society and d therefore easier to put into perspective. I also love what you’ve done with your blog layout! I think the red background is really cool and with your white text selection it makes your writing really pop out. Your margins are somewhat narrow though. There is a feasible half inch at least that you could stretch your blog to fit so that your stories don’t run quite as thin. Your image definitely ties into your version of the story and I think it’s a really good thing for formatting that you put the quote of the original message above it. However, your image doesn’t have any kind of source identification. Also, on the link to your original story you may want to secure a link that takes your reader directly to the source instead of having them click around trying to find it.
ReplyDeleteWow, it looks like you actually took the time to find an interesting template for your blog, so kudos on that (I certainly didn't bother). That being said, the important part here is the story, which also caught my attention. As I read the first sentence, I'd suggest that you write "they heard a loud pop" rather than "a loud pop was heard." Using the active voice instead of the passive voice would make this "pop" they heard pop even more (pardon the stupid phrasing there). The rest of the story was really good, though! I really liked your modern take on the story. Lastly, as mentioned in the previous comment, you need to include a source link for your image. Overall, I really enjoyed this story. Though, I did have to click around a bit to find the original, so you should probably link directly to it. Good job on this storytelling!
ReplyDelete